Then I am your man. Not only do I provide scintillating intellectual content, delivered jargon-free with strict focus on understanding, I promise not to wear t-shirts and shorts and that I am still of the camp which believes a tie completes an outfit. In other words, I look competent in promotional pictures.
My bona fides in brief: Adjunct Professor of Statistics, Cornell University, one-time Assistant Professor of Biostatistics at Cornell Medical School, past member of the American Meteorological Society Probability & Statistics Committee, published author, consultant with major clients including the Wall Street Journal, and on and on. Full details here.
Let me come and tell you…
- …Why global warming is not as frightening as you have heard. Or hoped.
- …All about the Epidemiologist Fallacy, that great grant-generating gadget.
- …The Top Five1 mistakes Marketing Statistics make.
- …Our Top Seven Fallacies in probability and statistics.
- …Just why you should never, ever, not even one more time, use a p-value.
- …What Predictive Analytics is, and what it is not.
- …When and if you should get excited when you hear “New research shows…”
- …That logical probability is the superior and true understanding of probability.
- …How classical frequentist statistics differs from Bayesian statistics.
- …A defense of why frequentism should no longer be taught to undergraduates.
- …About any of a myriad other topics in uncertainty.
My rates are unreasonable, but the sting you will feel paying them is far less than the soul-wrenching pain you will experience by ignoring me. I’m only kidding about the unreasonable bit.
I do it all: from one hour (de-)motivational lunch speeches (my voice carries over the crunching of salads), to logico-comedy routines (“What happens when you throw a white hat into the Black sea? It gets wet!”), to multi-part lectures and training sessions, to full-semester length courses.
Your duty as a reader, if you aren’t going to hire me yourself, is to send this page to somebody who can, attaching your most heart-warming recommendation with it.
Here is a performance, atypical, marred by paying insufficient attention to the iron (linen wrinkles easily) and from meeting my pals Willie Soon and Juan Ramirez (who picked up the check) in the lobby bar the night before.
1Forgive me the garish titles.