If We Are What We Sexually Desire, How About These Curious People?

The gender wars have been with us since we invented the term ‘orientation’, which separated man from his biology, and replaced it with Fantasy. This column, which ran originally on 29 October 2014, tried to alert people to the idea that if you allowed the idea ‘orientation’ all behavior must be allowed. It failed. But maybe today its message carries more weight.

Gender theory in brief says we are what we sexually desire. It’s not that we have desires, but that we are these desires. They are the core of our being. They make and form us. They are our orientation.

That’s why Yours Truly is not what he appears and what his biology made him, i.e. a man, a male human being, but is instead a “heterosexual” or, in slang, “a straight.” I cannot escape from this prison or these desires even if I wanted to, which I don’t. And since this state is forced upon me without my consent, and because anyway I like it, you must respect and even celebrate this fact. I must wear my orientation as a badge. You may not judge me.

We all know the other categorizations of desire and of their increasing prominence, so we needn’t cover them. But what do we make of these people, a group with very specific sexual desires?

Denmark already has a handful of animal brothels which, according to Ice News, a site specialized in Nordic reporting, charge between 85and170 depending on the animal of choice.

…24 percent of the population would like freedom of movement when it comes to pursuing beasts for pleasure. In a Vice Video aptly called “Animal [Edited]” one unnamed man explains what turns him on in the animal kingdom. “I’m into human females. I’m into horse females,” he says. “I’m asexual towards rats. I’m a bit voyeuristic about dogs and women.”

…People who literally love their animals have been tied to a series of side crimes. In August, a woman in New Mexico tried to kill her roommates after they witnessed her having sex with a dog and admitting to having sex “multiple times” with both roommates’ dogs. In September, a priest who was convicted of 24 counts of pedophila against Inuit people in Nanavut, Canada, had a bestiality record as well.

It’s little known, but bestiality is legal is several countries, mostly in Europe. Some animal “rights” groups are seeking to change these laws because they are concerned that animals are not giving “consent” to these odd encounters. Well, the animal that turned into my breakfast sausage probably wasn’t consulted about that, either. But let that pass. What matters is that the acts, legal or not, are somewhat common, in the sense that this kind of desire has been known across the centuries.

What to call these folks? Zoophilia is the technical term for the desire, but “zoophiliacs” is unwieldy. How about woofies? That has a pleasant, nonjudgemental, evocative tone.

Since gender theory insists we are our desires, then people who lust after aardvarks and wombats and the like are not people but woofies.

Do woofies have certain gifts and qualities to offer society? Are we capable of welcoming these people, guaranteeing to them a fraternal space in our communities? Often woofies wish to encounter a culture that offers them a welcoming home. Are our communities capable of providing that, accepting and valuing their sexual orientation?

Good questions, those. The reader should answer them.

Now I know that some of you will have a “yuck” response and will say that woofie desires are “unnatural.” But I’m afraid that won’t do. Because to say something is “unnatural” is to logically imply there is such a thing as human nature. It is to admit that those critics who decry “sexual orientations” as so much farcical academic tootling and who say that instead natural law should be our guide to behavior are right. Do we really want that? Accept natural law and what happens to all those other “orientations” which are also unnatural? Some deep kimchee there, brother.

You might try insisting that woofie behavior is “disgusting”. That doesn’t fly, either. The acts of many orientations are disgusting, too, and are often crippling to health. And isn’t “disgusting” a matter of personal taste?

Can you say that woofies are “perverted”? No. That is to draw an artificial line, a line which cannot be discovered by natural law but only by reference to a vote, and votes are malleable. Today we say “perverted” and next week we all walk past the pet shop window with a gleam in our eyes, only to see us come back in time to “perverted.” People are fickle.

How about man-beast “marriages”? Several people have already walked down that aisle. “Marriage” is whatever we say it is anyway, so all woofies need to recognize their civil unions is a good judge.

Zoophobes, the bigots, haven’t a leg to stand on, morally speaking. Let’s ostracize them.

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