It is an old dialog, and, as much as I dislike cliche, on the reasonable chance that many have not yet seen or heard it, I repeat it here.
“Why anybody can have a brain,” said the Great Wizard. “That’s a very mediocre commodity. Every pusillanimous creature that crawls on the earth or slinks through slimy seas has a brain. Back where I come from we have universities. Seats of great learning! Where men go to become great thinkers. And when they come out, they think deep thoughts. And with no more brains than you have. But, they have one thing you haven’t got. A diploma! Therefore, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the universitatis committeatum e pluribus unum, I hereby confer upon you the honorary degree of ThD.
“ThD?” asked Scarecrow.
“Doctor of thinkology.”
“The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side,” he said pompously. “O joy! Rapture!”
There it all was, our downfall spelled out, and as early as 1939.
Recall the Scarecrow, a minority among minorities, had no brain. He did not have one after receiving his credential, either, his “Degree” awarded by a fraud, himself accredited by a dubious agency. Only that after Scarecrow received his Degree, he began to think and spout great thoughts. Great wrong thoughts. Certified great wrong thoughts. Thoughts that if you were to attempt to correct publicly, you would be charged with Official Disinformation.
And, you surely did not miss it, Scarecrow thought very well of himself for having thought them.
We advance a few years and now see Scarecrow ensconced in his Chair at Prestige U. writing papers about his fears of the uncredentialed who prowl around the halls of academe seeking the ruin of souls. Because, it seems, Scarecrow’s math error was pointed out to him, not by another Expert, but by a civilian who had written him an unsolicited email. Intolerable effrontery!
Scarecrow called his congresslady and together they had a lobbyist write a bill mandating that only Certified Credentialed Experts could make Official Judgments pertaining to their subject matter. It was called the Experts Know Best Act.
Well, that’s fiction. It hasn’t happened, not yet. But Experts are pushing, dare we say nudging, in that direction.
Long-time readers will recall I predicted that a day would come when Experts would say you, as natural parents to your offspring, could not parent as well as they could, because they had PhDs in parentology. And that there argument would be how could you, in your uncredentialed state, possibly know as much as an Expert? Answer: you cannot.
Meet Dr Caitlin Baird—doctor, mind you—who took to Twitter as a representative Expert to argue why you, as a parent, could not possibly teach your child as well as Dr she (second ellipsis mine; others hers).
RIP my mentions, but seriously…what makes anyone believe they’re qualified to homeschool their kids K-12? it’s not as if teaching a) isn’t age-, grade-, and subject-specific; and b) requires a college degree in pedagogy
I mean, hell, I have…lemmee count…13 + 4 + 2 + 6 = 25 years of education (27 if you count postdocs and postbacs) and 4 degrees in both the sciences and the humanities, and I would never presume to believe I was qualified to teach all subjects? for every grade?? and all ages?…
I also, you know, have a mouth, but would never assume I can do my own dentistry with anything resembling competence
You, or rather most of you, will not have a PhD in linguistics or philology or larynxology or whatever is the proper field which covers the development of language, but, lo, here are your wee bairn flitting about with words on their tongues. This should not be possible.
Of course, not every parent can teach every child every subject. But then, in spite of rumors otherwise, not every child can learn every subject. Most parents can, if they tried, teach them at least as well as professionals, and many could teach them better, as they could skip with woke indoctrinations. After all, teaching the times table is not equivalent to attempting orthodontics, but it takes a non-Expert to see it.
The primary drive of Experts is the need of affirmation, and its mirrored horror of uncredentialed disagreement. (For a nauseating example, see this.) If they had their way, every aspect of life would have a PhD lording over it. The old joke that everything that is not forbidden is mandatory would come to life.
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