What Does COVID Have To Do With Long Hair? — Guest Post by GG

The next battlefield for the ongoing war against COVID-19 is long hair, proving yet again that the crisis is awash in contradictions. By introducing a situation where men and women cannot attend to their regular grooming routines because the hair-cutting places are forced to be closed (due to the perceived danger of spreading the virus)—resulting in more people having longer hair—and at the same time censuring those who do have long hair as a health risk, is perfectly emblematic of the current progressive era. Images of salons and barber shops that have been allowed to open are pure theater.

But what is behind the call for “bobs for all”? For a generation, there has been undeniable subtle pressure on women and girls to cut their hair. Any woman who has any length will be frequently approached by some misguided soul who will ask, “”re you going to donate your hair to Locks of Love?” or, more pointedly, “When will you be donating your hair to Locks of Love.”

Locks of Love is an organization that will take unwanted ponytails and fashion the strands into wigs for children who have cancer. If there is a donation in the vicinity, small town newspapers will often report on the hair cut, often accompanied by a photo of a happy girl and perhaps with the hairdresser, showing off a patch of lopped-off hair that soon will be whizzing off to do Good Works. If the long-haired person responds with a quiet “no”, then they they are cast as some kind of selfish lout who hates child cancer patients for wanting to keep their own hair that grows out of their very own head.

There is social pressure to cut hair. “You would look so cute with it cut short”—a well meaning short-haired friend or relative will say, brandishing an image of the latest celeb who went under the scissors. And the long-haired person will think, maybe I will be cute, forgetting that they are cute no matter what. There is an allowance for girls and teens to have long hair and braids that hang to their waist—but only as a stage. Sooner or later, they will have to get down to business and cut it short. Who is going to tell Greta Thunberg that she has to cut her hair for the greater good?

First of all, long hair is not only a symbol of beauty, the crowning glory, but also one of health. It takes a good diet to grow hair of any length. Hair that grows out of head with a bad diet will be prone to breakage and thinness. So, if all women are mandated to cut their hair short, what will easily differentiate the healthy from the unhealthy? There are degrees of short hair, from some kind curly fluff to intentionally masculine cuts that are done with a razor. Short hair ranges from the still-feminine “cute” to the androgynous. Will the experts weigh in on what type of haircut is most preferable?

Second, long hair is environmentally friendly. If there are trips to the salon, they are far and few between, and not the monthly check-ins that the short-haired gals need. Often short hair needs more pomade and other unguents to keep it from looking like a rat’s nest. If one wants to tally up the cost of products, the product bottles and packaging that will be headed to the recycler, hair salon visits, the short-haired woman will end up with a bigger hit to the pocketbook than the average long-haired lady.

Third, who are these experts and why do they care so much about someone else’s hair? Are they in the pocket of Big Salon? Are they getting secret payouts from the shampoo industry? Let’s see those conflict of interest forms!

Beyond COVID, this cry which even as late as last week would have seemed ridiculous, is another attempt at the Great Leveling. Most women have already stuffed their bodies into atheleisure garb, so they are indistinguishable from one another, broadly speaking, no pun intended. To have mandated short hair is to have Mao 2.0. This time, though, with the input of experts, we will avoid some of the Chairman’s errors.

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21 Thoughts

  1. I volunteer to tell Greta. (Only because I don’t like Greta. I love long hair.)

    Hair falls out for all kinds of reasons besides “health”. Tell me you cannot be that stupid.

    Did you lose a “sarc” tag on this post?????

  2. How wonderful! a fight between members of Team Woman. And Sheri is right: long hair has NOTHING — NOTHING — to do with making members of Team Woman distinguishable, particularly between Hot or… not. (Oh, excuse me — between ‘Health’… or not).

    And members of Team Woman would never, ever feel, and get, pressure from each other, about ANYTHING. Unthinkable.

    Ladies, honest discussion is important: pray, continue. Just please — let me watch.

  3. The CDC – Center for Disastrous Consequences

    “The Global Health Security Agenda (GHSA), launched in 2014, is a global effort to strengthen the world’s ability to prevent, detect, and respond to infectious disease threats, whether they are naturally occurring, or accidentally, or intentionally released. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) plays a leading role in the implementation of the GHSA for the United States by working with countries to strengthen their capabilities to identify, track, and stop disease outbreaks and public health emergencies as quickly as possible. Because of the nature of infectious diseases, everyone remains vulnerable, including people living in the United States, until every country in the world can rapidly identify and contain public health threats.”

    https://www.cdc.gov/globalhealth/security/ghsareport/2018/protecting-americans.html

    OK, The CDC utterly failed in all of its claims of competence and so, of course, Americans are quick to try and comply with each and every subsequent absurd CDC recommendation because nothing succeeds like failure.

    The CDC did not prevent the Kung Flu.

    The CDC did not detect the Kung Flu.

    The CDC did not adequately/sensibly respond to The Kung Flu.

    Within the speciality of medicine, The CDC was as effective in preventing, detecting and responding to The Kung Flu as were all of the 666 Intelligence agencies in preventing, detecting and responding to 911.

    Was the CDC failure as intentional as were the failures of the intelligence agencies?

  4. Problems with lockdown hair?
    See Jake dDavis from John Freida.

    Hair health is like nail health and skin health, to a certain degree, the body saves the best for the rest and whatever’s left goes into the hair and nails. Females know when something’s gone wrong because they can tell the fair changes. Obviously hair his inert material but so unicorn horns and hooves.

    You can judge a female from her hair but is it fair? Who dare even if they care?
    I think women take as much delight in their own hair as men do, probably more, in fact. Men aren’t so fussy!
    Feminine hair is back in fashion thank goodness. None of the space age look, or harsh severe cuts for us real females.
    I’m scary enough.

  5. Those typos are from the comment box monster
    When Trump drains the swamp to the last dregs, that monster’s going to show itself.

  6. Re womens’ hair! Mine is white and short on top…courtesy of nature…on the sides mine is a mxture of white and brown….courtesy of nature….and down the back of my head mine is brown….courtesy of nature….plus my hair is long on the sides and down my back…..courtesy of nature….so that I braid an eight inch long braid every morning!!

    And it is not that the hair on top breaks, it just grows no longer than a few inches…
    which actually gives a nice framing, I think.

    God bless, C-Marie

  7. What is this thing with women and hair? My wife drives me nuts
    with it very little else gets to me. “You didn’t even notice I had a
    haircut or you really need a haircut you’re starting to look like
    a hippie”. And then they obsess over other women’s hair; my mother
    basically drove my sisters crazy with it they still ain’t right.

  8. Hmm, Fredo, sounds like she’s hinting and gave up being subtle.
    TRYING to get to you because she gets a reaction!
    …Just a suggestion.
    Hair matters! to women. They’re all princesses deep down somewhere. Whatever else. Nature made females that way. Not in the way that Briggs might imply princess, either.
    …and what is it with men of a certain age that they like to moan about their wives? Do they become too proud? Or do they just do it to look hard with the lads? A bit of both. Which shows they don’t grow up and don’t necessarily tell the truth.

    They really never work women out, just, which buttons to press.
    Like flying a helicopter, apparently, If you knew its complexity and precariousness before you started you wouldn’t go near it. Or something like that. Can’t remember the quote.

  9. You can buy pot, get an abortion, tear down statues, and loot the down town, but you can’t get a haircut or go to church. By order of the Democrat Party. Kneeling in church — no way. Kneeling in obeisance to Karl Marx — required. Any questions?

    Gimme a head with hair
    Long beautiful hair
    Shining, gleaming,
    Streaming, flaxen, waxen
    Give me down to there hair
    Shoulder length or longer
    Here baby, there mama
    Everywhere daddy daddy
    Hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair

  10. Somebody said waxon

    Try Frangipani Monoi in the hair you want beaachwaves.
    before hot shampooing as a treatment or a tiny bit at the ends when dry just because you can Always us elasticised and don’t use a two in one. The moon is just one of the best scents in the universe, (Hope Briggs & Co do perfume next, that’s another feminine obsession )

    For very shiny hair, use dream-coat. Check instructions before use
    Or,
    Let your hair dry naturally. ..use minimal unguents. Dream-coat will help you do that

  11. What is going on this morning!
    ‘Elasticiser’ and “the monoi” not “the moon”

    For goodness sake…
    I’m now off to vanilla and orange blossom my hair, because I can and it isn’t illegal yet in England although it’s illegal to talk about it amongst the pious on the internet

  12. Interesting comments. Considering a full half my hair fell out in college, going from waist length and thick to shoulder length and thin, I gave up on hair at that point. I really did love the long hair and would take it back in a minute if it would grow out that far. Much like C-Marie says, my hair does as it pleases. It’s been several colors and I have never artificially colored it. I did blame the college food service for the demise of my hair, being about as nutritious as a cardboard box, but it never recovered, so who knows. I do know the hit the economy would take if hair were suddenly not important. But don’t worry–vanity about hair goes back decades, centuries maybe. It’s not leaving soon.

  13. Sheri, a list of a few factors re quality of hair:
    On Hair length:

    Physical:
    Damage from heat: heated rollers, hairdryers, tongues and straightening irons,
    Excess UV
    Dusty environments,
    Hard water for washing although likely helps with growth re drinking,

    Excessive manipulation
    Tying back tight
    tugging with bad brushes,
    Dreadful combs which have barbes where the plastic moulds between the teeth (slice hair shaft)
    use of elastic bands!
    Chlorine, old fashioned chemical treatments
    tight pony tails, be gentle,
    excess shampooing,
    Motorcycling

    Excess shedding or reduced growth:
    Poor scalp health or allergies, products build up,
    Normal seasonal growth changes,
    systemic illness,
    medications.
    Mal absorption of minerals or vitamins
    Nutritional insufficiency.
    anaemia of any kind,
    hormonal fluctuations:
    pregnancy,
    medication,
    Tumours
    Autoimmune disorders,
    Menopause,
    Metabolic conditions
    Masculinity or daughter of male stock which loses hair,
    Stress.

    North American risk factors:
    Having it torn out by a bear in the woods
    meeting an unhappy Indian.
    (source, calamity Jane).

    Non mitigation of the above where possible.
    So there’s quite a bit women can do to offset.

    Someone else can do the study that shows.

  14. Joy: No heated rollers, hairdryers, etc. It dries all on its own.
    I wear a hat in the sun—one with a large brim
    Dust—that could be one factor
    Hard water—not according to my water testing
    I don’t tie back tight, don’t manipulate, or tug—few elastic bands and always covered. No perms or curling.
    No chlorine
    NEVER could wear tight pony tails even as a child
    Never be caught dead on a motorcycle

    Autoimmune is the most likely. Since it fell out in college, we can eliminate menopause. Allergies, yes, only use one type of shampoo and not daily. I suppose I should have added that my hair fell out everywhere, not just on my head. There was at least half or so left on the head, virtually none anywhere else. No doctor seems to know why. There are names for this, but no why’s.

    As for the bear, I have a large gun. Unhappy Indian? Not with all those casinos making money!!!

    I do appreciate the ideas, but at my age, I’ve pretty much gone through every idea out there. My hair is what it is and will never be what it was.

  15. Fredo,
    I’m Sorry, I assume you knew I was kidding…just in case
    Sheri,
    Knew you’d have it sussed. I’ll keep thinking about it, those kinds of puzzles interest me.

  16. Joy–I agree, though the number of these puzzles I run into with myself kind of takes some of the fun out of it. I think I enjoy them more if I’m trying to solve them for someone else. The hair is just a minor thing that bugged me for a while and then I adjusted. As I said, I did love my waist length hair and miss it, but there are much bigger and more serious things to deal with in life!

  17. Very, very, very few women look good with extremely short hair (Audrey Hepburn, Haley Berry or that chick from Northern Exposure). And those few who do still look better with longer hair anyway.

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