Synod Leaders Sign Pact Of Extreme Global Warming, Silly Walks

Over the weekend, so ace report Edward Pentin tells us, leaders at the Amazon Synod signed a document “Pact of the Catacombs for the Common Home”, an echo of an earlier document affirmed at the end of Vatican II, “Pact of the Catacombs“.

The first pact required signers to “definitively renounce the appearance and reality of riches, especially regarding to our manner of dress (rich material, loud colours) and symbols made of precious materials (they should in reality be evangelical signs)”.

This explains why nuns took on the appearance of lesbian librarians and priests donned torn jeans. The love of beauty, they considered, was not to love God.

Anyway, as of this writing, there is no link to the text except Pentin’s pictures. So I have done us the painful service of transposing the juiciest bits.

After the preamble, produced, it seems, from Hallmark’s Spirituality Division, come the bullet points.

1. To assume, in the face of extreme global warming and the depletion of natural resources, the commitment, in our territories and with our attitudes, to defend the Amazon jungle. From it comes the gifts of water for much of the South American territory, the contribution to the carbon cycle, and the regulation of the global climate, an incalculable biodiversity and a rich socio-diversity for humanity and the entire earth.

Extreme global warming? As in the-temperature-hasn’t-really-gone-up-for-a-couple-of-decades-but-it-might-so-be-terrified-as-winter-afternoons-might-becomes-slightly-warmer?

Did you notice the white supremacism? The biodiversity is “incalculable”, but the people diversity is only rich. Shame them for this blatant racism.

2. To recognize we are not the owners of Mother Earth, but rather the sons and daughters…

Somebody must have substituted Gaia’s Guide for the Bible again. Scripture says something slightly different:

Then God said: Let us make human beings in our image, after our likeness. Let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, the birds of the air, the tame animals, all the wild animals, and all the creatures that crawl on the earth.

God created mankind in his image; in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.

God blessed them and God said to them: Be fertile and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it. Have dominion over the fish of the sea, the birds of the air, and all the living things that crawl on the earth.

God also said: See, I give you every seed-bearing plant on all the earth and every tree that has seed-bearing fruit on it to be your food; and to all the wild animals, all the birds of the air, and all the living creatures that crawl on the earth, I give all the green plants for food. And so it happened.

Of course, God caused those words to be written before He knew about extreme global warming, so He has an excuse. Do you?

4. To renew in our churches the preferential option for the poor, especially native peoples…guarantee their right to be protagonists…To help them preserve their lands, cultures, languages, stories, and identities and spiritualities.

Spiritualities? Pachamama! Does that mean we have to worship Piranha during mass now? The Liturgy of the Biting Teeth. We must “grow in awareness” that these spiritualities “must be respected” and to ensure “that they be welcomed on an equal footing in the world concert of people and cultures.”

(Dear reader, after typing that last sentence, I had to scourge my fingers with acid to clean the gloopy sugar from them.)

Number 5: “abandon…all types of colonialist posture and mentality”. Except, as we all agree, the imposition on all peoples the glorious tenets of Diversity, Equality, and all the other noble SJW goals.

My favorite is #8. “To walk ecumenically”, which is a silly walk because it would have us stroll “in the inculturation and liberating proclamation of the Gospel with other religions and people of good will, in solidarity with original peoples…” Unoriginal peoples are screwed.

To interject a sober note, almost an impossibility these days, I repeat that those who refuse to say “This is right and that wrong” must bow to those who will.

Number 9: To live “a synodal lifestyle”. Which, since the word is nowhere defined, must be a style of life that surrenders to every cultural fad in order to avoid mean looks.

What’s oddest is the last bullet, #15. In it we are abjured to defend the rights of “migrants” and “refugees”.

Well, which is it? Do we defer to original peoples, or to the newcomer migrants? Who has the most rights? Or are certain peoples—and we know who they are—never to be considered original? Is their spirituality not to be respected?

Anyway, skip all that, and let’s agree, as this most spiritual document insists (#14), to use “public transportation whenever possible.”

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6 Thoughts

  1. Pachamama, full of heat
    give us the goodthink
    Blessed art thou among planets
    and blessed is the fruit of your dirt
    pachamama, mother earth
    we’re sorry for our carbon
    now and at the hour of our extinction

  2. Well, which is it? Do we defer to original peoples, or to the newcomer migrants? Who has the most rights? Or are certain peoples—and we know who they are—never to be considered original? Is their spirituality not to be respected?

    All ecumenists are equal. Some ecumenists are more equal than others.

  3. Gary: Good comment.

    We cannot destroy the planet unless God says so. Anything else is a complete lie and can be mocked and ridiculed.

  4. News flash the world has been ending every day of every year since
    the beginning of recorded history. Some wack job some where has predicted it
    and it’s inevitable some day it will happen, just not today. What sets
    this current crop of loons apart are the billions of iterations of this insane
    mantra broadcast worldwide to an ever credulous and by design
    dumb-ed down population. The expectation is that those billions of
    iterations will turn into trillions in taxes and fees. Germany is a very
    good example of the economic and kultural consequences of believing
    the new green eulogy just watch the melt down it’s well underway.

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