It’s that special time of year, dear reader. The moment has once again come to tell the world of this fine blog.
I have done the calculation: if every one of you emails one friend—or, if you don’t have any friends, one enemy—and convince him to put in an appearance on this blog, then my readership will double.
Even better: if we all join in on the effort and have 31 more annual Pass On Briggs Days, then every citizen of planet will be a reader. You can’t ask for more than that. All I have to do is come up with material for 11,323 more posts. Simple!
My purpose is mercenary. I make my living by people wandering across the site and saying to themselves, “What a marvelous find! What a perspicacious fellow! I must give this man some money.” Actually, they mustn’t just say it to themselves, they must follow through on the thought. Noble intentions are terrific, but they do not allow me to make my regular and generous donations to the Internal Revenue Service.
Now, since you are a regular, it means that you are an intelligent, active, thoughtful individual—almost certainly of above-average physical beauty—with a schedule full duties of vast importance to all of mankind. You haven’t the time to compose frivolous emails. So, in the spirit of generosity and, yes, humbleness, I’ve done the work for you. All you need do is cut and paste the following into your favorite email client.
Dear Friend/Enemy of Mine,
I want you to go to the website http://wmbriggs.com . I go there everyday at least once daily, and you should, too. In fact, I’m surprised that you haven’t gone already.
It is difficult to describe the intellectual delights that await you at http://wmbriggs.com . Prescient analysis, penetrating reasoning, flawless predictions, and prose just shy of the darker shades of chartreuse.
But don’t take my word for it. Listen to what these eminent authorities have to say:
Artemus Ward said, “This here http://wmbriggs.com is better ‘en a colekshun of wax fingers.”
Mark Twain said, “After lies, damned lies, and statistics, you will find http://wmbriggs.com .”
Bernard Shaw said, “If marriage is the death of hope, then http://wmbriggs.com is the marriage of hope and probability.”
Nothing can be added to praise as generous as this, except to say that I expect to see your screen name in the list of comments when next I visit—which will be tomorrow. You always have an opinion on everything, and now is your chance to air it.
[Insert Name Here]
Send this to your wealthier friends, especially any which have a medieval bent of mind and desire to be a Patron of Science and Philosophy. I have in mind a new—by which I mean old—idea of a university, one which is dedicated to the pursuit of truth and not to the chasing of balls, grants, or large enrollments.
Such places don’t come cheap. But more on that another day.
Incidentally, don’t delay your task of emailing somebody. If you put it off for later, you will forget. And then how bad will you feel? Best to do it now.