William M. Briggs

Statistician to the Stars!

Al Gore Says Climate Skeptics Are Racist

The Algore, a creature created from worn parts of defunct Tennessee Politicians—the vile experiment funded by Big Tobacco—a creature made wealthy by his wailing, awash in the money of Big Green, vaunted, feted, and lionized by those whom he terrorizes, a creature once thought vanquished, has again struck fear into the hearts of the citizenry.

“You are racists!” the Algore moaned.

This lumbering Climate Creature knows what spooks. No cry can freeze the heart faster than this. The American heart, that is. America is a land where the subject of race evinces a unique and peculiar lunacy. Calling somebody a racist in America is worse than calling him a murderer. If you accuse a man of murder, you at least have to have proof of the deed. But charging racism requires no evidence other than a fervid imagination.

The Climate Creature was caught on camera by UStream, affording us a rare opportunity to study him.

True to his malicious nature, he told the interviewer that what matters is to “Win the conversation.” Chilling words!

 

 

Why? Because he did not say we must “Determine what is true.” Through his dark ways, he would turn science into a battle of Good versus Evil. In his nightmarish vision, scientists would abandon objectivity and convince the unwary by mere “depth of conviction and strength of passion.” In the same way, that is, the Climate Creature woofs and bays to scare up donations.

Strange words seeped from the Climate Creature’s mouth. His agony was apparent. Only the evil believe that pain shared is pain alleviated. He wanted it to cut when he cried “Racist!” He asked,

Explain to me why it’s right to discriminate against people because of their skin color?

He was not asking the admissions boards of the University of Michigan or of Harvard, nor did he direct his question to various Fire Departments who must hire by quota, nor even to Eric Holder, all agencies who would answer that discrimination based on skin color is not only necessary but good in and of itself.

He meant that skeptical climate scientists should answer it. Rather, he thought that the act of asking would contain sufficient force to turn to jelly the souls of his enemies. Alas, he failed. I will answer the question.

It’s not right. It is even harmful. Explain to me then, Creature, why you support those who think it is not only right but who would increase its practice?

The Algore attacked with a new weapon and claimed that to use the word climate is “politically incorrect.” By this he sought what every political monster yearns for: victimhood. If you can convince the electorate—an easy task—that you are not a sole sufferer but a member of a group which anguishes, then you are equipped with an unanswerable argument.

It matters not that there is no power which can be shown to hold sway over this group. All that is required is that the group can be identified. For then the government can be redressed. Funds can be administered. Votes garnered. Bureaucracies engaged.

Horror increases!

The Climate Creature likened racism to the “moral component” of climate science. A tortuous, tenuous analogy made null because there is none. There is no moral component to any science. There is what is true and what is false, and how we can or cannot tell which is which. Morals are a matter for people, not science. And the people whose business is science are no more equipped to tell us what is morally important about science than the statesman, priest, novelist, or philosopher.

Sensing his flaw, and now flailing, in a becalmed rage, the Creature said there was an “Organized effort to attack” the scientific community as a whole. Who attacks? “Powerful polluters”—who want to keep the public mired in confusion.

What do you want to be when you grow up, son? A Powerful Polluter, dad.

He has invented an enemy who does not exist. The brilliance of this ploy is evident. If the enemy, because of his vaporous nature, cannot be dispatched, he will always be an enemy which can be alluded to, a force which must be forever held at bay with the proper application of money and political power.

Lock your doors and turn off those televisions! Beware Algore, the Climate Creature!

14 Comments

  1. Matt! You are silly. lol

  2. The Climate Creature!! hahaha

  3. A bit early for Halloween but that’s crass commercialism for ya.

  4. It’s post modern science. Belief is more important than evidence. That’s why they keep harping on scientific consensus. If enough people believe something, it must be true. Disbelief is taken as heresy and expressing disbelief to others is blasphemy. When Al gets his office of the climate inquisition up and running, Dr. Briggs will pay for this ridicule with the auto-de-fe.

  5. Ray has it right. The left has come after science to get the results it wants and they’ve done it by deconstructing the scientific process then redefining it in terms of moral relativism.

    The end justifies the means.

  6. As I said over on another site, another way of looking at this.

    Gore’s analogy of the AGW debate to the civil rights debate is very useful if explored, for example:

    By analogy Al Gore is a civil rights supporting, yet slave-owning, plantation owner, in his use of private jets, multiple residences, and opulent life-style. To offset his ownership of slaves (carbon footprint) he purchases slave offsets from civil rights NGO’s working to free other slaves, but not his own. Sometimes he even purchases offsets from himself. Maybe he buys a slave from himself and through accounting demonstrates that there are now less slaves than previously, as now they are labeled indentured servants.

    It is this hypocrisy which continues to pull the moral rug out of any statement by Gore, and most other AGW supporters. Go with this. Use this if the racist meme takes hold. Anyone who gets on a plane is just like a old southern slave-owner. I’ve challenged McKibben on his air travel and he mumbles crap about sacrifices for the greater good, but unless these people can lead by example, they can be ridiculed incessantly.

  7. jeez,

    A perfect analogy, and one not taken out of context, since it was Al Gore who first presented it. When one is hoisted upon one’s own petard, one is truly hoisted. :-)

    Now, more importantly, we need a baby ice story over at Lucia’s.

    Cheers!

  8. Of course, lost in the comments and post is the fact that Gore neither said nor implied any such thing. What label does that make appropriate for you?

  9. The time has come to stop feeding the Algore climate monster with the attention it so obviously craves and requires for survival.

    Even its own Eloi are starting to ignore it – the Climate Reality (or whatever) Project made barely a ripple – should critics do any less (is more)? The more we ignore it, the more it will flail and thrash in an empty theater, the quicker to expire and join the Paul Erhlichs and John Holdrens of the world in the dust bin of history.

  10. It’s official: everything the Left does not like is simply a form of racism. Take a position, any position, and when your opponent starts presenting a winning counter-argument, cry “Racism”! It’s easy, it’s quick, and so very effective(?!). Racism, it’s not what is used to be.

  11. http://www.redstate.com/repair_man_jack/2011/08/29/how-i-lost-my-amateur-status-as-a-fire-breathing-racist/

    Al Gore couldn’t even wint he conversation at his own dinner table. His dad filibustered the Civil Rights Act of 1964.

  12. Jeez,

    Your analogy is making me think about Thomas Jefferson who had a rather conflicted point of veiw on slavery.

    He expounded on the virtues of freedom and owned slaves. He was a “good” slave master, who treated his slaves right, and promissed them their freedom upon his death. He rationalized that he was doing his slaves a favor through his enlightened management of his their life.

    Al Gore is a good climate poluter. He only destroys the world because his work is important to save it.

  13. People ! For God’s sake ! Global warming IS the reality !! AND it would never happen if we would elect A. Gore. Or, perhaps, if we did not defraud him. Anyway, the world is ending in Dec 2012 and I blame the current weather, whatever it is, on democrats. Somebody is responsible for that, no?

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